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I appreciate your post @AbramBaileyAuD. I’ve also learned a great deal from this forum - though mostly as a reader and not a contributor.

I was a new member in recent months and received a short helpful message from one of the three and then received a long and very put-offish post from the same poster. It was a real turn-off. It was also a turn-off because no one else said anything, therefore the community seemed embracing of this type of thing. I responded I hope respectfully and not take it personally. It was confusing to say the least because I could read helpful posts by the same author and their opposites. The forum didn’t seem exactly welcoming. The poster deleted their post eventually.

Thanks for sharing your story, very clear and helpful.

This thread has given light to many here. Many of us didn’t think saying anything would help.

This happens on message boards of all kinds. Good for you for banning them for a period of time. Sometimes we all get “Snarkey.” If a poster to this board continues to be disruptive, then they should be permanently banned. This board is a resource for many.

In reply to @4mulch

@4mulch said:

no one else said anything

I don’t know if I was following that topic or not (and I’ve got 2 of the 3 in my ignore list, so I may not have seen their post anyway), but… sorry! We all have our own level of tolerance for conflict and sometimes we just look the other way. Glad you’re still here.

Bluntness and sarcasm can be a fun way to communicate among friends who share the same communication style. But it can be very off putting to others. I doubt that there is much call for it in a public forum. I personally have gained from the knowledge of at least two of these individuals. I hope they will come back and and use a different or more moderate style in their written comments. In this case, I believe the moderator did the proper thing. I hope it has a positive effect.

Edited

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, to quote Spock. Or as I don’t agree with that statement 100% there is truth to it.

I have at least one of them muted, myself. I have over 10 years experience moderating a very busy forum. You really have to weigh the needs of the forum and the majority. In this case one bad apple does spoil the whole bunch. You done good.

I’m thinking a permaban is in order. The only problem with a permaban is that you can never really ban someone fully. They always figure out a way to come back under a different name with a different email address, a different phone number, and a different address using a VPN. I hope I’m not giving anyone any ideas. Lol

Best
Musician

Large, open forums like this require moderators and moderation. Don’t apologize for maintaining an appropriate standard, and thank you for doing so.

They should be given a chance to return with a clear explanation of what is expected and what the consequence will be if they don’t comply with the expectation.

Edited

Abram, in his initial post says he gave them lots of warnings. I am sure he also explained to them what is expected. They chose not to listen. Why would they do so now ?

In reply to @Dogday

I’ve been in lots of forums over the years. Temporary bans are not uncommon. Permabans are much less common and usually only for particularly egregious violations or after several temporary bans in a fixed period of time. At least in the forums that I’ve been in, it’s very rare for someone to receive a permaban without having been temporarily banned at least a few times. I don’t spend nearly as much time here as many others do, but I do recall noticing two of them (SpudGunner and prodigyplace) in many of the threads that I’ve posted in. I would not have suspected either of them were going to be banned temporarily, let alone permanently. I won’t argue that there are a fair number of superfluous posts, but it’s generally quite civil here. Perhaps in this situation, it’s more of a case of “quantity over quality”.

I’m absolutely not second-guessing @AbramBaileyAuD decision to temporarily ban the offenders. I think he does a great job of running this forum and I doubt he would have done this had he not felt it was necessary. That said, I think they should be given another chance after taking the time off to contemplate their respective contributions. If they don’t moderate themselves, then ban them permanently.

Regarding second chances - Moderating forums is a time-consuming and PITA job. Given that the moderators have apparently already had to spend too much time in this case, I wouldn’t ask them to spend even more. The only argument I can think of in favor of another chance is that it might be less problematic to supervise the posters under their existing names than under new ones.

Given the discussion in this thread, if it were me I’d be too embarrassed to return using the same ID. I hope we maintain the same civility and diversity of posters if the suspension is lifted. The last few days I’ve enjoyed reading the forum and seeing new or returning people posting.

Edited

There seem to be few advocates for the three stooges in question because they occasionally give good advice and some find their remarks humorous.

But the thing is, this is an excellent source for needed information but i think we should remember that we have no way of knowing which members might be struggling with issues very stressful.

These are not easy times what with covid etc and inflation. We cant know the stressful situations of some who come here and we dont need to. However, an ounce of prevention… might prevent a tragedy. For some tragedies in other site forums its too late for people who felt singled out and bullied. One might say they were too sensitive and need to toughen up. I ask everyone to think ahead that we dont know if part of the reason people come here, in addition to advice, is because they might feel lonely or isolated (which can be exaccerbated by hearing impairment).

We arent social workers but we are human beings. WHAT IF for a sensitive member who took things to heart, resorted to the last extreme ultimate way to find a way out of the pain he or she felt for whatever reason. We might never find out that one of us died by his/her own hand, or the reasoning involved or the struggle, comments in this or any public forum should not be the last straw that drove them to self-destruct. To some lucky and secure individuals they just see a snarky comment or might seem nothing but a twisted sense of humor, but to an individual feeling cut off, isolated in a too-silent world, who might have just lost a loved one even a loved pet, the pain can feel too great and life as it was became intolerable.

Its not on my profile but i am an empath. Look it up if you dont know. Its not anything i took classes in, for whatever reason its a talent or sometimes a curse that i was born with. I pick up on the energy and emotions of others including sometimes animals and for whom the pain and heartache and fear become too great. I have learned that to protect myself, i choose a self imposed time out from overwhelming sadness i sense around me

Maybe im not explaining it well. but i ask you to tread lightly where the souls and minds and circumstances of others among is concerned, we cannot know who among us is weak and contemplating a permanent time out.

If the three were here i know what ive said here would result in a barrage of attacks. So Im glad they arent here so i could tell you what i know. Whether you believe me or not is up to you and i thank you for letting me say it because i sincerely want to help

Edited

Im just calling it like i see it which is my right and you have yours so why are you criticizing mine. The three arent here are they or are they, maybe you are one if them. I didnt say i was a fortune teller. Why of they arent here cant i speak my mind. I sense that yours is not an altruistic attitude toward me. We shouldnt be adversaries but it didnt take long to get a backlash. If you defend the 3 why can you not defend my right yo an opinion and they did at times, in my opinion, act like stooges. It is what it is.

Edited

Did i say i was here to defend all mankind? I didnt sign up for this. I didnt say i walk on water. And as someone who has felt the stinging pursuit and insults of them can i not have a voice? Im not here to defend the world. Would it help if i called them Wise Men/Guys. Why do you feel driven to advocate for them. The Doctor asked for feedback and i gave mine Excuse Me.

Why do i feel their presence even when they are gone? They’re EVERYWHERE I guess.

They never travel alone, what an amazing fortuitous happenstance. Wherever one snark posts its nothing short of a miracle that one of the pals is there on lightning flash time to agree and/or join the attack.

In reply to @JordanK

So they are lonely, is that now a defense for miscreants or worse yet, for felons? Yer honor, i killed him because i was lonely with the mrs gone off on holiday. I dont think its a defense that will fly

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