Good afternoon, everyone! I’m new to this forum. I really want to share my complex and my intention to part with it. The fact is that I work as a pediatric ophthalmologist, I do strabismus surgery and provide assistance to premature infants with retinopathy of prematurity. I have quite high qualifications in my professional activity. I am able to conduct electrophysiological examinations of the organ of vision and describe them well. I do not see an otorhinolaryngologist, but I visit a very competent audiologist who perfectly adjusts my hearing aids. I have been using auxiliary devices for 18 years. But I still haven’t been able to move to a new level of acceptance of my problem. I always hide my devices behind my hair and feel embarrassed if I get into awkward situations related to hearing. How would you react to the situation if you came to an appointment with an ophthalmologist with your child and saw that the doctor was wearing hearing aids?
Since I wear hearing aids my opinion is probably biased. But to answer your question, If I even noticed you had hearing aids, I would not care. In the years before I retired, nobody ever asked me about my hearing aids (male with short hair), and I often pointed to them when I didn’t hear someone clearly. I believe the perception that poor hearing is a defect is only in the eyes of the person wearing the hearing aids, not in the person talking to you.
Thank you for your reply! Every opinion is very important to me! I am grateful to God, to the universe, for meeting wonderful people on my way. My husband shares your opinion. And throughout our family life, he brings it to me. Now I feel confident in myself to open up to people. And my fitness trainer will be the first (although I think he has seen everything in my ears for a long time)
I am now retired but i worked as a IT professional for almost 10 years wearing aids. I did most of my work by way of the phones. My employer made sure I had the extra equipment that I needed. At the time I wore aids and could easily use headphones over my ears. When connectivity and Bluetooth first came along i had an extra device to connect my hearing aids to the phone by way of 3.5mm audio cable. This worked even better.
Others treated me no different than any other employee and my employer treated me great and provided what ever I needed to preform my job.
As someone who was an adult patient of a pediatric ophthalmologist for strabismus surgery in my 50s, I have the greatest respect for your profession. (Even if I failed to take advantage of the toys in the waiting room.)
As a woman who also wore as a professional, and in a male-dominated profession, I understand your concerns. I was told I was a candidate for HAs in my 40s. I pooh-poohed that, but to be honest, I was worried about stigma and yes, vanity. But a few years later, I found myself running board meetings and not being able to follow the discussions. So I caved.
What I found was that most people never noticed that I was wearing them. My first HAs were “jumbo shrimp” – those huge hideous pink “flesh”-colored things. Hugely stigmatizing – I actually cried when I came out of my first fitting appointment. But tech advantages slimmed them down over the next few years, and they were offered in colors that meant they were well hidden by my hair. My husband wears HAs now – not as consistently as I do – and I often have to look hard to see if he has them on. He has short hair. My hair hides mine, but I have for years simply pulled it back. I learned not to care if someone sees them.
Now, of course, EVERYBODY has something in their ears! Airpods changed the age thing.
I think you’ll eventually realize your concerns are your concerns, and not those of your patients and their families. I learned to “own” them – to be upfront about them. And if anyone comments on them (a VERY rare occurence now, but originally simply because they thought I was ‘too young’ for HAs), or if anyone even now expresses hesitancy about getting them, I immediately launch into my Bionic Woman mode – saying how cool they are because I can do stuff that they can’t do: beam phone calls into my ears, stream audio books, crank volume up or down in restaurants, eavesdrop…People’s eyes go wide, and some are even a bit envious. I would think your little kid patients would be impressed. And when I tell them that if I left my phone next to them, I would be able to hear what they were saying from the next room – well, they get downright respectful.
I’ll tell you what’s worse: I’ve known two highly respected doctors who desperately needed HAs and delayed getting them. Probably for the reasons you cite. I often wonder what mistakes were made because of it. What did they not hear or, worse, mishear?
If I see someone with HAs, I either think nothing of it or feel a sense of kinship. And at some level, I have respect. The way to push back against stigma is to succeed.
You’ll get there. Practice “owning” them – maybe in a conversation with a friend who needs them or with a little kid who will simply thing they’re cool. It’s quite empowering. And, just maybe, you’ll find yourself rocking a fine pair of neon-pink HAs a few years from now. Your patients would be impressed!
Simple questions.
Do you feel you really need the hearing aids to do your job?
Are you embarrassed that you have to wear hearing aids and are looking for an excuse not to wear them.
I apologize if the questions come off as insulating, they are not meant too.
One last thing. What would your patient think of they know you might not understand them correctly.
I never got any feelings of resentment, if that is what you mean. But then again I was the senior IT professional in the group. I was not a manager or team lead of any kind, just the most experienced. I was a Microsoft Certified System Engineer Master level. This is a hard to come by level of experience.
Thank you so much for your detailed answer!!! I understand that I’m on the right track!!! And by taking a step towards breaking up with this problem, which is more far-fetched by me, I will gain a lot! Thanks again! I will reread your answer many times, it gives me motivation!
Thanks for the questions! I really love my assistive devices and wear them all the time. My problem is that I hide them and constantly worry about not being seen by others. It’s very exhausting.
No I was wearing aids when i was hired. I actually put in my resume that I was hard of hearing and wore aids. I was raised by my extended family to always be bluntly honest. When I went on the phone with a customer that didn’t know me, I started the conversation with I have a hearing loss and wear hearing aids, please speak slowly and clearly and please be understanding if I ask for a repeat or say what. My regular customers always emailed or texted me in advance with their issues. I also used remote sections by logging into customer systems and finding the issues. I didn’t have but one customer issue but that faded when the customer understood I was the top of the food chain and his last resort. I was hired because of my experience and expertise and the fact I had a top secret security clearance.
I understand.
I used to bend the crap out of my wires and jam the aids down so no one would notice.
At least in my mind.
Woke up one day.
I don’t care.
I tell people I wear them when I have trouble hearing them.
If people are put off by your hearing aids, they have a problem not you.
My opinion, your hearing aids will grow on you. Eventually you won’t care what other people think.
What’s the difference between wearing glasses and wearing hearing aids? A couple of weeks ago, I noticed for the first time, that my dentist wears hearing aids. I’m sure that over the years of listening to the high pitched whine of the dentist’s drill has affected his hearing. My hearing was affected by giving flight instruction in small, very noisy, light airplanes for several years. I would guess that none of your former patients would have even noticed your hearing aids. However, if in your conversations with them, you had to keep asking them to speak up, or say to them, please repeat that, then they would notice your hearing deficit and would probably lose confidence in your professional abilities.
Thanks for the answer!!! My patients don’t notice hearing deficits because the devices are perfectly tuned, just as they don’t see my assistive devices. There came a time when I was just emotionally tired of worrying about keeping them hidden and thinking about keeping them out of sight. When I go to the operating room, I hide them under a cap so that they are not visible. Now my goal is to get away from this moment and wear them openly.
Thanks for the answer! I had no such experience, I always carried auxiliary devices, I started my profession with them. I have no experience wearing them openly, without hiding them from people under my hair.
New Jersey
